Tuesday, April 9, 2013

Turning 30 years old

I'm turning 30 years old in 2 weeks time. Amazing, isn't it? Nah, amazing is not the part about turning 30 years old, but amazing is the part where I announce I'm turning 30 years old in a blog which could be googled by anyone at anyplace in the world and at any timezone. As they say, a woman never reveal her real age. But PY being PY, she loves to act the opposite way, she's just simply a 30 years old rebellious woman.

Well, officially being a woman in her early thirties soon, I guess I can indulge in some nostalgic moments here. I didn't manage to achieve what I thought I would achieve by the time I am a 30 years old woman, but I guess majority of us don't. There's two side of the story to comfort ourselves why we didn't achieve what we thought we should achieve. Story No. 1: We were young and naive and hence as we mature, we no longer want to achieve what we want to achieve back then. Story No. 2: We haven't achieve what we should achieve by this age, but doesn't mean we should give up. So long as we try hard, we would live a life without regrets.

Ok, after babbling a whole paragraph about some positive quotes and philosophies in life... Let's get into something lighter, sharing of some happy memories....

That's me when I was 21 years old. Believe it or not, I still have these set of clothings at home, but as some sleeping attire.

Those were the days of rave parties in college times... I was 22 years old

I will always miss Redang.. It's not really because of the place. Though it's beautiful, but we can always find many beautiful beaches in the world. But it's the people whom you go with and the experience you shared that made the trip always fresh in my mind. I was 23 years old

Me looking nerdy. Totally. I know... But it was my first job and within 3 months time, I was thrown to Cambodia for a job. Auditing Save The Children, where we were auditing budgets funded by Angelina Jolie and Sting. It was pretty interesting... I was 24 years old

Bali. Posted simply because I miss my slim legs back then :P I was 25 years old.

Nah, I'm not gonna post pics till I turn 30 years old. LOL

Yeah, I had a lot of fun all these years. But I had also some bitter experiences in relationships too. I know... I know... I should stop the laments. If there is really someone reading my blog, the person would thought, when will this girl stop sulking on relationships and etc.. But honestly, sulking helps.

Being arrogant, I usually boast to friends that with my past bad experiences, I can simply go through any bad relationship without a heart break nowadays. But honestly, the last I had a serious relationship was in 2010. That is 3 years ago. Well, I did date couple of guys, casually. But I always thought to myself that this will bring me nowhere but some companionship. With that attitude, I'm portrayed as a cool and independent girl.  However the moment I try to set my heart for a person, I became an ugly person. I'm possessive, jealous, demanding, rebellious and rude. Yeah, the ugly bit of me start to emerge. Thinking hard, I don't mind being an ugly person upon breakup. But what I can't take is truly, the torture of loving a person again. The torture of little little things that he do which when I was sensible, it was nothing disappointing or hurtful, but when I'm in love, it just simply felt like a knife had just made it's way through my heart.